Domestic violence comes in so many different forms. Physical, mental, emotional, ect…and yes FINANCIAL. An abuser can use money as their form of power to belittle someone. The effects of abuse can last long after the victim has broken free. It can take years to overcome, but with love and bravery it is possible. Read Tonya’s story of how she became brave and overcame the abuse in her life.
What gave you the courage become free and leave your situation?
Domestic violence experiences are complex. I left when I realized that I didn’t want that situation to be my life. I got tired of the roller coaster of emotions and realized that being alone was better than being in a dangerous situation. My parent’s and family worked too hard for me to allow someone to alter or possibly end my life. I owed it to the, my unborn children, and myself to leave that situation.
How long did you endure the abuse? Nearly 2 years (the physical portion). The scars form the financial abuse lasted nearly 10 years.
What was the motivation to remain free? The happiness I experienced in life without him.
Do you consider yourself brave? Definitely. Brave and fortunate.
One piece of advice you’d give a woman who is enduring her own struggle currently? That there is a such thing as happiness and you deserve it. Love does not hurt. Society sells us this narrative that love is messy and hurtful, but it isn’t. Love is one of the purest most beautiful emotions the creator bestows upon us and if your love doesn’t feel beautiful, cleansing, and empowering, that is not love, it is something else masking itself as love.